


Spoilt Little Bitch

by SharknadoFam



Series: Sherlock Oneshots [1]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Arguing, Banter, Insulting each other but its lowkey flirting, Other, Post series 4, Reader is gender neutral, Slight blood mention, Supermarket Shopping, Swearing, a lot of swearing, and i mean A LOT of swearing, arguing like an old married couple, britishisms, i really suck at appropriately tagging so I’m tagging everything i can think of, sherlock and reader argue, shouting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2020-12-04
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:54:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27878686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SharknadoFam/pseuds/SharknadoFam
Summary: Sherlock and the Reader regularly argue over little things. When Sherlock goes too far, the reader gets their revenge.
Relationships: Sherlock & Reader, Sherlock Holmes & Reader, Sherlock Holmes/Reader, Sherlock/Reader
Series: Sherlock Oneshots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2041245
Kudos: 11





	Spoilt Little Bitch

You lock the door behind you and roll your eyes, making a slight puffing noise as to reflect your distaste for the London weather. Despite the fact that summer had been and gone, you were still left wanting more of those sunny days, even though it was mid October and there was more chance of you winning the lottery than seeing the sun peek through the layers of clouds. And you don’t even play the lottery.

You drop your shopping bags down beside you and remove your glasses, noticing that as well as the many water droplets that had accumulated on their lenses, there was also a drop of blood left spattered in the corner of one of them. ‘That's probably why the people in the supermarket kept giving you such funny looks’, you think to yourself. 

Looking up to the top of the staircase, you feel a sudden regret. 'Why on Earth did I buy all these bottles of wine?' You thought, 'They're gonna be a bitch to drag up the stairs'. Nevertheless, you grab the shopping bags, and heroically begin your journey up to apartment 221B.

"Sherlock, John!" You holler while unlocking the door to their flat "I've got your shopping for you!"  
"Thanks" John replies from behind his bedroom door. You smile slightly, after all, it's nice to receive thanks for going out of your way to do something. Maybe it would help if Sherlock knew that. It would definitely help him get laid. You chuckle to yourself, and place the shopping bags on the counter. 

"Y/N?" You hear from the front room, "could you make me some tea?"  
"Oh fuck off Sherlock I'm busy, alright?" You respond rather bitterly. ‘I do his damn shopping for him, clean his damn room when it gets too bloody unbearable, make him food when he's too damn busy to feed himself, and what's the thanks I get? I get to make him tea’ You grumble to yourself internally.  
"No need to be so harsh" he replies  
"Are you kidding me? Are you pulling my motherfucking leg right now? I'm putting away the shopping I have just bought for you. The shopping that I went out of my way to get in the rain, that I don't even see the benefit of, and you have the audacity to ask me to make you some tea when you didn't even reply to me when I said I had brought the fucking shopping!" You take a few deep breaths to refill your lungs following your sudden explosion. 

Outbursts like these were pretty common in this household. Despite doing the shopping for the both of them, you didn’t actually live at 221B, you lived down the street from there with a married couple. They're alright, though it gets lonely now and then, but they do argue far less than you and Sherlock do. 

"Alright calm down, I don't need tea anyway." He snapped back, in a childish manner.  
"Are you actually being serious right now you spoilt little bitch!" You return "you want tea because you've gone out of your way to ask me for it, yet when faced with the arduous task of making it yourself, you decide that you don't actually want tea. You're talking a load of old shit!”

"Would you two calm down and stop swearing please? Rosie is in the other room asleep" John silently yells through gritted teeth "honestly, you two argue like an old married couple."  
"No John, no, I live with a married couple and they don't argue like this. We argue like a normal person and a little fucking bitch!" You respond rather quieter, but still retaining the seething anger in your voice.  
"Who's the little fucking bitch, you or me?" Sherlock asks while smirking. He had stood up from his splayed position on the sofa and had now made his way into the kitchen.  
"I am going to fucking kill you." You respond, staring him dead in the eyes.  
"Oh no, I’m so afraid!” he chided  
"Oh no, you bloody well should be!” You mock back, placing the jar of baby food you were holding onto the counter with a large crash.  
"Will both of you please shut up!" John yells, prompting Rosie to begin to scream bloody murder in the other room. "Now both of you apologise, whilst I see to my daughter who is crying because of you two and your petty arguments."  
"Why do I have to apologise?" Sherlock questions, turning to face John.  
"You don't, it's fine, I started it." You say rather calmly "I've had a rough day and the traffic was a nightmare. Sorry Sherlock, now can I make you that tea?"  
"Sure" he replies smugly "apology accepted." 

Sherlock trudges back over to the sofa and throws himself on it. He sighs a sigh of relief, knowing he had won the battle. Little did he know that you were going to win the war. 

"A nice, hot cup of tea" You say as you place the China cup and saucer on the table next to the sofa.  
"Thanks" uttered Sherlock, to which you raise an eyebrow.  
"Okay" You say confusedly, taking a seat in Sherlock's chair to watch the telly. 

You watch as Sherlock takes a sip, and you can see the steam coming off of the hot beverage. You thought, if you had been drinking it, your glasses would have for sure steamed up by now. He sat the cup back down again into its saucer and returned to his sitting position.  
"How do you like the tea?" You slyly spoke, grinning at him with the most evil, shit-eating grin you could muster.  
"Great, yeah" he replies, furrowing his eyebrows.  
"Good. I did spit in it by the way" You say, nonchalantly.  
"Ugh, you complete and utter arsehole!” he screams, wiping his tongue with his hands as if that was going to help.  
"Respect me next time, and don't be such a spoilt posh boy" You giggle  
"Whatever" he throws back at you, still trying to rid both his mouth and his brain of what he had just consumed.  
"Next time it won't be something as tame as saliva,” and with that remark you grab your coat and leave the flat, preparing yourself to be exposed to the elements once again. You enjoyed bugging Sherlock, and with not much else going on in your life, it was your number one pastime. Even though he could be a spoilt little bitch, by your own admission, you were content with his company, and even more content when you were given a chance to prove that maybe he wasn’t the smartest person in that flat - not when you were around, anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> This is an amendment of an old one shot of mine. I’m completely open to any constructive criticism you may have as this is my first work using the x reader structure. Thanks, and I hope you enjoyed!


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